Thankful, Not Tempted: Managing Stress and Triggers During the Holidays

The holidays are supposed to be “the most wonderful time of the year,” right? But for many people – especially those working to stay sober, reduce substance use – the season can bring more stress than cheer.

Between family gatherings, financial pressure, travel, and endless expectations, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. For those in recovery or trying to make healthier choices, the combination of emotional triggers and social temptation can make the season especially tough.

But here’s the good news: with the right mindset and support, the holidays can still be joyful, peaceful, and full of gratitude — not anxiety and temptation.

Let’s talk about practical ways to manage stress, avoid triggers, and stay connected to what truly matters this season.

1. Recognize Your Triggers Before They Recognize You

One of the most powerful tools in prevention and recovery is awareness. Knowing what sets you off helps you make a plan before the moment hits.

Common holiday triggers include:

• Family conflict or tension

• Grief and memories of lost loved ones

• Parties or gatherings where alcohol is served

• Financial strain or gift-giving pressure

• Loneliness or feeling left out
  

Take time now — before the holidays kick into full swing — to think about what situations might challenge you. Write them down. Then, for each one, create a simple strategy.

For example:

• Trigger: A family member who drinks heavily.
  Plan: Bring your own beverage, drive yourself so you can leave early, or politely decline the invitation.
  

• Trigger: Feeling lonely.
  Plan: Volunteer, attend a community event, or plan a coffee with a friend.
  

Awareness turns reaction into preparation — and that makes all the difference.

2. Communicate Your Boundaries Clearly

Boundaries aren’t walls — they’re doors you choose when and how to open. During the holidays, it’s okay to say no to things that threaten your peace or sobriety.

If you know a certain event, person, or place isn’t good for your mental health, you don’t owe anyone an explanation beyond, “That’s not something I can do this year.”

You can also ask for support from loved ones who understand your journey. A trusted friend, sponsor, or counselor can help you practice what to say and stay accountable when pressure rises.

Remember: setting boundaries isn’t selfish — it’s protective. And protecting your peace is an act of self-respect.

3. Keep Your Routine (As Much As Possible)

The holidays can throw off your sleep, eating habits, exercise routine, and schedule — and that disruption can increase stress and cravings.

If you’ve built healthy daily routines, try to stick to them.

• Eat balanced meals instead of skipping and bingeing later.

• Get outside for fresh air and movement, even if it’s just a short walk.

• Keep consistent wake-up and bedtimes.

• Stay hydrated (and yes, coffee and eggnog don’t count as water).
  

Your body and brain thrive on consistency. By keeping some structure, you reduce the emotional rollercoaster that can lead to impulsive choices.

4. Manage Stress Before It Manages You

We can’t avoid stress completely — but we can manage it in healthier ways.

Here are a few quick, proven strategies:

• Deep breathing: Take five slow breaths in through your nose, out through your mouth. It resets your nervous system.
  

• Mindfulness moments: Notice what’s around you — the smell of pie baking, the laughter in the room, the warmth of a blanket. Staying present can keep your mind from spiraling.
  

• Gratitude practice: Write down three things you’re thankful for each day. Focusing on gratitude can shift your mindset from pressure to peace.
  

• Reach out for support: Whether it’s a friend, counselor, or support group, connection lowers stress and reminds you that you’re not alone.
  

Counseling Services of Lancaster offers treatment programs, as well as recovery program referrals, that help individuals build coping tools for moments exactly like these. Reaching out is a sign of strength — not weakness.

5. Find Connection, Not Perfection

Perfection is overrated — and impossible. The “perfect” holiday family, meal, or gift only exists in commercials. What truly matters is connection: showing up, listening, and being kind to yourself and others.

Isolation is one of the strongest predictors of relapse. Connection, on the other hand, builds resilience. That doesn’t always mean big family gatherings — sometimes connection looks like coffee with a friend, volunteering at a food drive, or joining a recovery meeting.

Johann Hari said it best: “The opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety. It’s connection.”

When we connect with others, we remind ourselves that we’re part of something bigger — a community that cares.

6. Celebrate the Season Your Way

If traditional holiday gatherings don’t align with your goals, create new traditions.
Try hosting a sober Friendsgiving, baking day, or movie night. Take a drive to see Christmas lights, start a gratitude jar, or plan a day trip to one of Lancaster County’s beautiful parks or trails.

The point isn’t what you do — it’s that you do it intentionally. Building new memories that don’t revolve around substances helps reinforce your progress and joy.

If you’ve experienced loss or hardship this year, give yourself grace. Healing doesn’t follow a calendar. You can still find moments of peace and gratitude, even if the season looks different this time.

7. Practice Gratitude Every Day

It might sound simple, but gratitude changes everything. Studies show that regularly practicing gratitude can lower stress, improve sleep, and even reduce the risk of relapse for people in recovery.

Try starting or ending your day with one sentence:
“Today, I’m thankful for…”

It could be your health, your kids, your job, or simply the fact that you made it through another day.

Gratitude doesn’t erase struggle — but it reminds us that even in hard seasons, there’s something worth holding onto.

Know Where to Turn for Help

If you or someone you love is struggling this season, Counseling Services of Lancaster is here to help. We provide prevention, counseling, and treatment services for individuals and families impacted by substance misuse — always judgment-free and focused on real-life solutions. We can also help you find community resources to help keep you aligned with your sobriety. 

Whether you need support staying sober, help managing stress, or guidance for a loved one, you don’t have to face it alone. This holiday season, give yourself the gift of connection, not perfection. Thankful, not tempted. Supported, not struggling.

Because together, we can make this season about healing, hope, and new beginnings. Reach out to us today if you need support.